Hi. I’m Taylor, and I’m an introvert. My whole life has been an ongoing series of “maybe if I sit in the back with my head down, they won’t see me, and won’t talk to me, and won’t bother me.” 21 years have gone by, and I’ve been quite anxious for most of them. Resting comfortably in my little box, holding onto familiar things as a security blanket of sorts. Granted, the longer I live, the better I’m trying to be about it. (but it’s a process)
**PSA: I apologize for this slightly lengthy story… Just get comfy, and hopefully you can gain somethinggg from it. Who knows, perhaps it will even inspire your soul just like it did mine!**
A few Saturdays ago, I did something way out of my comfort zone… Mom and I made the decision to attend a writers workshop. Even though it was ran by a close family friend who I’ve known for roughly 70% of my life (yes, I did the math)…that truly didn’t make it any easier for me. Don’t get me wrong, I was VERY excited, and I knew it was something that I needed to do for myself. Hell, it might even be that perfect outlet for all the unanswered questions currently on my mind. Little did I know just how much I would need it when the time came.
This last week, or month actually, has been HARD. I’m not sure why exactly, but it has just taken quite a toll on me mentally. Causing me to spiral in a dangerous downfall of self doubt, discouragement, and fear all over again. The days leading up to the event, I was finding myself nervous and anxious about the whole thing. Wondering if I should pull my standard Taylor-move of looking for an out before I even began. Wondering if I was good enough to go, and if this was the right path for me.
Let me tell you. The universe SCREAMED at me, yet again. (I know we’ve talked about this before–it’s real, y’all.) So I finally decided to listen to that voice in my head, knowing deep down that this was good for me.
Fast-forward to the day-of and GUYS…you have no idea how happy I am that I went. That day changed so much in me! For so long, I have desperately loved the idea of writing, and inspiring others through this form of “art” if you call it that–and boy is it REAL. Doing this to either make a living, or just as a fun side hustle, is REAL. And so so possible! It was one of the most motivating things I could imagine, to see actual examples of people I know, and from our area, making this come true. Working at what they love, and not giving up, just spoke to my heart. Getting to sit around and have lunch with authors and various successful people (of all ages) was simply incredible!
This was an opportunity that I had no idea I needed, but so badly did. In several ways, it forced me to step a little further out of my cozy corner and try new things that I otherwise would be very insecure and fighting NOT to do. But I DID. In this instance, I truly have Ms. Amanda Flinn to thank. (pleaseee check her out at amandaflinn.com) She has known me since I was knee high to a grasshopper, and being very aware of my personality, she took it upon herself to kick my butt in gear. Taking action to make sure I couldn’t just sit back and observe like I’m so used to doing. Usually, I’d be quite resistant and maybe slightly upset about a situation like that, but instead, I’m so so grateful.
This workshop has given me new tools, new resources, new outlets and networks to express my work and share it with the world. Even if just a small part for now. I don’t use the word “blessed” very often, but that’s certainly how I’m feeling right now. Feeling like this is exactly where I’m supposed to be at exactly the right time. Sometimes obstacles are thrown into our path to make us stronger, not to deter us from the journey altogether. I gained a whole new respect for other creators, and was simply moved at how passionate and empowering every single person was. No one trying to out-do each other or be better than the rest. All of us are here for the same reason one way or another, and it was so refreshing to share that common love and be surrounded by people in our wheelhouse. I can’t say enough great things honestly. I left feeling more excited than ever, and ready to get out there and create!
Sometimes we need that step BACK to regroup, but don’t forget about that very important next step FORWARD that gets you on the right path. I can not wait to share more with you as I continue learning and experiencing life. I really think this is going to be fun!
Until next time,
Just keep trying, darling! Even when you’re scared.